Oct 7- Quitting Time

Meditation: Chopra, Creating Abundance: Pure Consciousness
Length: 15 minutes
Where: Living Room, Los Angeles
How It Felt: Hard to focus

I had a realization this week about something in my life that needs changed and it affects other people and I am so stressed about dealing with this. It absolutely needs to happen… but I love, love, love the people involved and feel like I am letting them down. I wanted our situation to work so much…. but it’s not. It just isn’t. I would give up too much to keep going.

I had this in mind as I sat down to meditate today and I could barely focus. I kept thinking about the best way to deal with it, trying to find that magic way that’s going to make it all wonderful. That doesn’t exist. It’s going to suck. There may be tears.

I want to put this off forever and also, even more, want to get it over with immediately.

I hate letting people down. I love being the person who comes to the rescue and solves the problem. I love being able to help. Who doesn’t?

Time to do the hard thing and get to the other side. Ugh.

Maybe I can find a meditation tomorrow called “Get in the Perfect Mindset to Disappoint the Hell Out of Someone.”

For now, I’m going to go crawl into bed with my wonderful husband, curl up on his chest, and take all the comfort he gives me. A good marriage makes the good times twice as good and the hard times half as hard. Having him here will give me strength! Grateful, always grateful, for that.

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