Dec 21- Pure Joy

Meditation: Headspace, Transforming Anger #2
Length: 11 minutes
Where: Comfy chair, bedroom, Michigan
How It Felt: Soothing

Took a “me” day today since Steve was busy with his last day of work, plus he kindly ran some errands for us and had a two hour meeting with his men’s group. I thought I should take advantage of the quiet house and charge up my introvert brain.

It was lovely. I rested, I read, I watched British baking shows. I finished assembling our holiday cards for Steve to mail. I did Duolingo and some laundry, plus some dishes. I didn’t get out of my pajamas the entire day. I spoke with my sister about the standup careers we are determined to finally start this year. Steve watched my shows with me when he finally had time to relax.

The next nine days are going to be nonstop, but I’m ready now!

I will say, I do love this meditation series. I feel this little batch of anger that I’ve stirred up lately starting to dissipate. I’m feeling but letting it pass through. I’m melting and forgiving and opening my heart back up in the deep places I hadn’t even realized it was closed off.

Nice way to go into the fresh new year.

I found my phrase for 2022: Pure Joy. I’m going to do what feels good, follow the work my heart points me toward, create beautiful or messy or crazy things, take care of myself unapologetically so I can give more freely to my loved ones, and, most of all, I’m going to protect my open energy by listening to my gut and my body. We know what feels good, and that’s what we should have more of in our lives.

I plan to march confidently toward what feels amazing from now on. I don’t have to justify it to anyone (especially myself.) I don’t have to question if things “should” be harder, or listen to those doubts about whether I’m “ready.” The only criteria is- does this bring me joy? If it does, it’s in. If it doesn’t… time to pass it along.

I expect some pushback, most of all from myself but certainly from some others. I expect a lot of adventure and joy. I expect some wrestling with the guilt that comes from not struggling enough to justify the good things happening. I expect to overcome that guilt.

Time to just do what I know is right, for me, for my career, for my loved ones, for the world around me, for the moment.

I can’t wait for 2022!